We
live in an ever-changing climate towards gender. Gender roles and identity are
beginning to be reexamined, but they are not being accepted by the
majority.
Why
is this?
People
are scared and they don’t know the facts.
“If
I let him play with dolls and my high heels, will this affect his masculinity?
Will this make him gay?” Lise
Eliot, the author of Pink Brain, Blue
Brain looks at this question from the viewpoint of a typical mother and
simply responds, “No.” Her book examines many studies and experiments, which
gives evidence that even if one desires control over their children’s sexual
orientation, they can’t control it. There appears to be something greater than
parenting and social pressure that determines sexual orientation. There is an
innate and biological aspect, which some refuse to acknowledge but is very
relevant and real. In the past surgeons have made large efforts to change a
child’s sex. It has been seen repeatedly that if a child is born as a boy, for
example, once they grow up, regardless of the surgeries and hormones given to
them, they will still show sexual attraction to women. This demonstrates a sort
of hard-wired component beyond the contributions from nurture alone. In another
study, a boy named Kyle who showed feminine behaviors was examined. Every time
Kyle showed feminine behavior, he was punished while every time he displayed
masculine behavior he was rewarded. Even though he suppressed his feminine
behaviors and was pushed to play stereotypical male roles, he still turned out
to be homosexual. The only effect that forced gender identity had on him was a
life long battle with depression and suicidal thoughts.
There
is nothing wrong with gender identity; as humans, we like to categorize things.
What is wrong is our judgment and our society's sense of anxiety in terms of
gender breaking our conservative barriers. In an article by Peggy Orenstein in The New York Times, the
issue of toys and gender is examined. Should the world of toys be gender-free?
Although this article doesn’t directly state the scare parents have of sexual
orientation, it introduces the idea of gender neutrality and the idea of
gender-stereotyped toys. Preschooler’s brains are extremely malleable and very
open to influence in terms of the roles that play into their sex; therefore,
environment does play into what children choose to play with. Orenstein states
“stereotypical gendered play patterns may have more negative long-term impact
on kids potential than parents imagine.” She also goes on to say that promoting
cross-sex friendship and play may be more beneficial to children of both sexes.
Although gender neutrality is a step in the right direction, I don’t find it
completely necessary. The world will probably never be a gender-neutral place
in which bathrooms and clothing sections are equally oriented for both sexes.
This isn’t a very realistic view, however, the way we view others and the
acceptance that we have for others can realistically change with time.
The
point is that there should be more freedom for children and fewer scares for
parents. It shouldn’t matter what children play with. If a girl wants to play
with Lego’s and a boy wants to play in a plastic- toy kitchen, then they should
be able to. Kids should be able to express themselves in the way that they
choose and parents should know that pushing children to play with the correct
“gender appropriate” toy will not influence their child’s sexual orientation.
Options allow children to learn, grow, and thrive in a multitude of ways. You
learn different things form so called girl and boy toys. A girl could probably
benefit from building with blocks aiding her spatial reasoning while a boy
could probably benefit from playing with dolls and role-playing which may aid
in his creative thought processes. It sells to market to gender, and this wont
stop anytime in the near future. We can approach situations, however, with a
different mindset and allow children to make their own innocent choices.
Works Cited
Elliot,
Lise. Pink Brain, Blue Brain. N.p.: Macmillan Australia, 2010. Print.
Orenstein, Peggy. "Should the World of Toys Be
Gender-Free?" The New York Times.
The New York Times, 29 Dec. 2011. Web.
Feb. 2014.
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